First off, what the heck is inner wisdom and how do we access it? Some really great questions...
It's something we sort of know exists but rarely rely on. But why not? Well, mostly, because our intuition is largely underdeveloped. Here are a few reasons why...
We are bombarded by so much information, all the time – so much so, that we have become quite dependent on seeking information with the click of our mouse or with the touch of the keyboard.
I get it, I am in the same boat. It’s easy, and we all love things easy. In fact, our brain loves things easy so it can run more efficiently on other stimuli in our lives. Easy = good, hard = pain; and our brain does not like pain!
Admittedly, while I was conceptualizing this post, as I do for all my posts, I was conducting research to find the specific ideas or points that I wanted to make. I mean, as much as I would love to be able to say that I know everything and can pull it off effortlessly, I am not a walking encyclopedia nor a guru with endless access to all things information. So yes, sometimes I need a starting point, and I do that by researching. This time, with a little help of AI.... why? Because it's easy! Urgh!
Let’s be clear. I wrote this post, but there was a part of me that really wanted to “cheat” my way through writing this so I didn’t have to think, but, how ironic would that have been considering the title? I actually had to laugh at myself… but honestly though, the world of AI… GAH!! I am not sure how I feel about it yet - another topic for another time, I guess.
Anyway, through my research, I came across this quote that I really liked:
“Your inner wisdom will always guide you, if you listen and let it in. If you get quiet inside your head, then your inner thoughts can come from your inner wisdom. When we are feeling judgemental, self-conscious, or just plain uncomfortable inside, then usually it is just that noise in our head talking loudly. I call this noise intellectual thinking which results from your opinions and limiting beliefs. True wisdom holds no opinions or judgments. A lot of inner chatter is just going to mess up with ideas that are not coming from your true inner wisdom or your unconscious mind”. – Jan Christenson.
Great quote, I think. It's great because, in a few short sentences, it clearly depicts what many of us experience. Too often we don't know the difference between that loud critical "thinking" voice and the inner guidance.
I will be the first person to tell you how magical your inner wisdom can be in offering guidance to all of life’s complexities. But on the same token, I have to tell you that I too, still struggle with giving myself the space to actually listen to and HEAR it. Trusting it is a whole other issue. In practicing, it’s getting easier, but, like many of you, I have some room for growth here…
But why? Why are we so spiritually disconnected? Why have we stopped listening to and trusting our own inner wisdom? These questions plague me and many others because, if you are like me, you know there is more to life than just the material world. So much more. But, because we can’t “see” it, we don’t trust it. At least, that’s what science teaches us, right?
We can begin by looking at modern society and how it has brought about significant changes in the way we perceive and interact with ourselves. While it has opened up so many avenues for personal growth and self-development, it has also introduced challenges that can hinder our ability to hear, believe in, and trust our inner wisdom.
Over the last few decades (likely more - I am not a historian or economist or trend follower, but I know there was a shift at some point in time and I am going to guess it's related to consumerism) we have learned to depend on external things to help us feel better about ourselves.
Many of us were born into a culture where if you didn't fit a certain mold, or didn't look or behave in a certain way, your so-called "condition" needed to be fixed. We learned to believe that there is "something" wrong with us and were sold on promises by so-called gurus and experts that they have all the secrets and that if you buy into their program or their product, your life will be solved... And when these things don't work, we walk away believing that we've done all we could, that we are broken and often feeling pretty hopeless.
SIDEBAR: Here's a secret - you are not broken!
Furthermore, in the age of the internet, we are constantly bombarded with information from all directions. This constant influx of external data can drown out our inner voice and make it challenging to discern our true feelings and intuition. At the very least, it has us second-guessing ourselves. It is so much easier to trust the information we see right in front of us than the information that comes to us from within. Why is that? Well, the information that comes from within, is uncertain. Feeling uncertain is uncomfortable for so many of us!
Truth bomb, I second-guess myself all the time. I believe that I am intelligent, but when I enter the rabbit hole of worldly information, I am reminded of how little I know. Or at least it feels that way. And by the way, it is so incredibly easy to get caught up in all the negative self-talk that occurs in parallel. I am a victim of that "voice": “You don’t know enough of anything”, “You are not smart enough to do this…”. Enter your own words here… It can be debilitating.
If you have been following my journey, you know how hard I have been working through these limiting beliefs. I no longer believe my inner critic, but it still creeps up from time to time. The difference now? I react with a little tough love and unconditional self-acceptance.
We second guess because we are simply unsure if we are current or “right” in our thinking because we have been taught to trust evidence and science, "seeing is believing" – even though our hearts or our gut are telling us otherwise. At least that's my experience. I can remember so many times in my life when someone replied to my intuitive responses with, “as if, that’s ridiculous!”, or “prove it” and worst of all, “you don’t know what you are talking about”. After being told this so many times, you start to doubt yourself – and I did.
And, with the explosion of these "social" sites where people showcase curated versions of their lives, we’ve created a culture of comparison. We are now, more than ever, aware of the “lack” in our lives, and we try to make up for it by pretending. Because, as humans, we want to fit in. In fact, belonging is a basic human need. How do we fit in? How do we belong? By being like others, relating with and to others, and in some cases, trying to be better than others.
When we see other people get all kinds of hearts and love, and thumbs-ups on social media, secretly we want some of that too! Because, well, it feels nice. It’s validating. But often, we are doing it for all the wrong reasons.
Rejection sucks, and so, to survive our world, we do what we feel we must, to fit in. Pretty basic. Except... it can get to a point where we feel completely insecure in who we are because often we allow ourselves to be inauthentic and untrue to ourselves, sometimes without realizing it. All we are left with are feelings of self-doubt which erode our trust in our own choices and instincts.
Instead of being who we are meant to be; instead of accepting ourselves, we find happiness (though very short-lived for most of us) from the approval and acceptance of others. Or by means that are external to ourselves. It’s a trap! (I wrote a post about happiness -you can read it here).
And then, there is the very fast-paced nature of modern life which leaves little room for reflection and introspection. For so many of us, time often feels like a scarce resource. Many people are juggling demanding jobs, family responsibilities, social commitments, and various other obligations. This constant rush from one task to another leaves little time for us to pause, breathe, and even less so, engage in self-reflection and self-discovery.
We’ve lost touch with who we are in essence, and all that this has done is force us to live in one version of ourselves, and ignore the parts of us that are so desperately trying to come through but are left ignored under the guise of being busy.
Harmony in life is critical. When we feel out of touch with certain aspects of our being or certain aspects of our lives are out of balance, often this leaves us feeling overwhelmed, unable to connect within, and feeling out of control, stuck, or hopeless. Here’s the thing, having a balanced existence is essential to healthy living.
Our mental well-being depends on us finding meaning in all of our activities and daily tasks. If the many aspects of your being find balance, then life satisfaction, fulfillment, and contentment typically follow.
Which brings me to my next point.
When we live unbalanced, this can have so many detrimental consequences to both our bodies and minds – which is often the root cause of the high stress levels we face every day. Which, in turn, can have detrimental impacts on your health – it is a vicious cycle.
The stresses of modern life, including work pressures, performance demands, financial concerns, family pressures, all of it, can really overwhelm us and make it challenging for us to think clearly. Because, when we live in a constant state of “fight or flight”, that is when we live under conditions of constant stress, it becomes more and more challenging to access the part of our brain (the pre-frontal lobe) that is responsible for emotion regulation, logical and rational thinking and decision-making.
When we live under constant stress, not only does this affect our body's natural defenses, but we find ourselves having trouble sleeping, our mood is erratic, we are more tired, and eventually, we develop chronic illnesses, which for the most part can be prevented. (There’s a lot of science backing this – just google the stress brain and you will find all kinds of information). Overall, long-term or chronic stress is not healthy.
We need to deactivate the stress brain and reactivate the parasympathetic nervous system, which is the rest and digest brain.
But how do we do that? Where do we begin to harmonize our lives better?
Well, that’s the whole point of this blog post, isn’t it? It begins with reconnecting with our inner Self.
We can begin by carving our moments of stillness, reflection, and mindfulness. It can be as simple as creating boundaries around work hours, unplugging from digital distractions, and prioritizing our own self-care so that we can begin to slow down, recenter, and nurture a deeper connection with our own inner wisdom and values.
But you have to choose it!
I will be the first person to tell you that, you have to choose it, commit, and follow through, because, like anything else, if you don’t, it will be just like that New Year’s resolution that only lasts a week or two, and whoops, back into old habits.
When I started my mindfulness journey, it didn’t happen overnight, but because I knew I had to change the way I lived my life, I committed to a lifelong journey of self-awareness and self-discovery and over time, life got beautiful. Life got easy. There are and will always be challenging moments, but how I relate to these moments is so completely different. And yes, life still tests me from time to time, and what I have learned is that a) life will always test me, and b) I just have to keep bringing myself back to mindfulness, meditation, and self-reflection.
Now, thankfully, there are many tools and resources available. Practices like meditation, mindfulness, journaling, and seeking out meaningful connections with others can foster a deeper sense of self-trust and belief in one's inner wisdom.
Today, I want to bring meditation as an option.
Imagine meditation as the sacred sanctuary within yourself—a place of stillness where you can reconnect with your inner wisdom. It's a practice that allows you to tap into the wellspring of your intuition, compassion, and authenticity. Through meditation, you can cultivate self-awareness in a profound and transformative way.
Consider meditation to be like a dance of self-discovery. It’s not about escaping from the self but diving deeper into it. It's an exploration of the inner realms, a dance of self-discovery that unfolds with each breath. As you sit in quiet contemplation, you'll begin to observe the patterns of your thoughts, the whispers of your emotions, and the gentle nudges of your intuition.
Because within you lies a well of wisdom that knows your true path and purpose. This inner wisdom is not the product of books or external guidance; it's the innate knowing that resides deep within your soul. Pretty freaking neat, right?!
Neat, and powerful.
We all have this misconception that in practicing meditation, we are supposed to clear or void our minds of thought. While in some types of meditation, this is the case, but that’s not what I am advocating for in this case.
What I am referring to is contemplative meditation. The kind that not only helps you relax but also guides you within. Within your Self, at an unconscious level so that you can begin to feel the freedom of who you are, with clarity.
And, as so eloquently put in the quote at the beginning of this post: "True wisdom holds no opinions or judgments. A lot of inner chatter is just going to mess up with ideas that are not coming from your true inner wisdom or your unconscious mind”. True inner wisdom respects you, is gentle, and has your best interest at heart. If it's anything but that, it is not guidance, it is intellectual chatter, opinions, and limiting beliefs. Practice stopping that inner voice that judges, and begin hearing your inner wisdom that loves.
But to hear it, we must first take some time to listen to it. And to listen to it, we must provide it the space to come through.
As a certified guided meditation framework facilitator, I offer regular momentary meditations live on my Facebook Page @reclaim Your Self with Stephanie Harris and on my YouTube Channel @reclaimyourself217. I encourage you to follow me on Facebook and Subscribe to my channel for opportunities to experience my guided meditations and other mindfulness and self-awareness gold nuggets!
Until next time, bye for now!
Perfectly Imperfect,
S
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